Seinfeld should i not have done that

Within a few days, he decides to have sex with the cleaning woman on top of his own desk in one of the show's most questionable dating choices.

A series of unfortunate events leads her to spill the beans to George's new boss, Mr. George Costanza is a master fibber, but he finds it difficult to keep up and choreograph his deceits when other people are involved. It all starts when Jerry makes the hilarious mistake of conjuring up a fake story about George in order to impress an old school flame that involves him being of all things a Marine Biologist.

Naturally, George's bad luck comes calling when they stumble across a crowd of people surrounding a beached whale. It's up to "Marine Biologist" George Costanza to save the day. Although his would-be girlfriend tells him to "go to Hell" after learning about the lie, George was left with the mother of all fish stories to wow his friends with. One's circle of friends and partner seem completely separate, and if they're together in the same room, it can be awkward. It really is like worlds are colliding — a perfectly apt metaphor.

It's even worse if worlds are colliding in a good way, such as when Elaine and Susan become pals. You are in that chair!

You are in the shackles! Eventually, he settles on "Oh, yeah? Well, the jerk store called. In an early episode of Seinfeld , George tries out a social experiment by wearing a wedding ring to see if it makes him more approachable to women. He ends up missing out on a friends-with-benefits situation, plus courtside seats to every sporting event at Madison Square Garden. WikiSein Explore.

Policies and Guidelines Manual of Style. Recent Blogs Community Forums. Articles Quotes. User Rights. Explore Wikis Community Central. Jerry come here for a second. Do you see anything here?

Jerry goes to the counter and pours some scotch. He drinks it. He comes back groggy. The lady starts cleaning. George has a thought. He watches the lady as she is cleaning. Jerry: You had sex with the cleaning woman on your desk? Who are you, how did you do that? George: Hennigans. I was there sitting in the office and the cleaning woman comes in. I've always been attracted to cleaning women. Cleaning women, chambermaids. George: So she starts vaccuming, back and forth, back and forth, her hips swivelling, her breasts, uh George: So we started drinking, and I'll tell you I don't know if it was the alcohol or the ammonia, but the next think I knew she was mopping the floor with me.

Jerry: You mean to tell me if I had put that drink six inches over to the right, and none of this would have happened. Elaine: Hey, let me ask you something something. Did George buy that sweater knowing the red dot was on it because it was cheaper? Jerry is unconfortable Ooookay, you just gave me the answer.

Jerry: I didn't have an expression. I have a deviated septum. I have to open my mouth sometimes to breathe. Jerry: Frankly I am shocked that you would ask such a question Elaine sticking out her tongue like she isn't buying a word of it of me, that you would think - the only surprise is how you could even think of that. That's what you were seeing.

George: I have to talk to Elaine. This cleaing lady is turning the screws on me. She's pushing for this whole relationship thing. She keeps calling me, threatening to go to the boss with this thing, I could lose my job, I gotta do something to keep her quiet.

Jerry: Elaine is in the bathroom. She's wise to whole red dot thing. She's asking me all kinds of questions. Elaine: Hey George, did you buy that sweater knowing that red dot was on it because you could get it at a discount?

George: Elaine, I'm, I'm shocked. I'm shocked. Here I go out in the spirit of the season Elaine looking like she's not buying a word of it and spend all my savings to buy you the most beautiful Christmas sweater I have ever seen to show my appreciation to you at Christmas and this is the thanks that I get at Christmas. George: Elaine you don't understand. I had temperature when I bought that sweater.

I was so dizzy I was seeing red dots everywhere. I thought everything in the store had a red dot on it. I couldn't distinguish one red dot from another. I couldn't afford anything. I have nothing. I haven't worked for a really long time. Jerry is standing right behind George. Jerry takes out a hankerchief and starts fake-crying in it. I mean look, I have no clothes, look at what I'm wearing. It's just a little red dot.

George: As you care for me. Which is why it is very important that you never breathe a word of this to anyone about the What, with Clarence Thomas and everything.

Lady: When I was a little girl in Panama, a rich American came to our town and he was wearing the softest most beautiful sweater. I said to him, "what do you call this most beautiful fabric? I repeated the words "cashmere, cashmere". I asked if I could have it, and he said "No. Get away from me.

But I grabbed onto his leg screaming for him to give me the sweater and he dragged me through the street. And then he kicked at me with the other foot and threw some change at me. Oh, but I didn't want the change Georgie. I wanted the cashmere. George: I had a feeling you would like it. No, don't try it on now, try it on later. Jerry: I was in the men's room the other day and they had the hand blower, instead of the paper towels, you know this thing. I like the hand blower I have to say.

It takes a little bit longer, but I feel when you're in a room with a revolting stench you want to spend as much time as you can. Jerry: Oh, wait a second, I believe we have a heckler ladies and gentlemen. Hey Dick I don't know what your problem is.

It's not my fault you're back on the wagon. Jerry: On the wagon. Don't you think they broke into a couple of those bottles along the way? Boss: I'm going to get right to the point. It has come to my attention that you and the cleaning woman have engaged in sexual intercourse on the desk in your office. Is that correct? George: Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I tell you I gotta plead ingnorance on this thing because if anyone had said anything to me at all when I first started here that that sort of thing was frouned upon, you know, cause I've worked in a lot of offices and I tell you peope do that all the time.

He tosses the sweater and it lands right on top of George's face. George walks out of the office "wearing" it. Dick walks over dragging behind him a Christmas tree.

He looks down and notices them under the table. George holds out the sweater, his hand shaking. Jerry: But in a way, I think I inadvertantly turned this guy into an alcoholic. I hate being around alcoholics because they're either telling you how much they love you or how much they hate you. And those are the two statements that scare me the most.

But I think he's okay now because I have no idea how he feels about me. He's finally off the wagon. Jerry: Don't get smart. Episodes Overview Scripts Contact. Click Here to join our new Seinfeld's fans community! The Red Dot Looking for a great gift idea for the holidays? Commercial At a party Jerry: Oh yeah, like you know what you're talking about. George: Like you do. Jerry: I don't know.

It's too early for a Christmas party isn't it? George: Why did France give that to us anyway? Jerry: It was a gift. George: So countries just exchange gifts like that? Jerry: If they like each other. George: There's Elaine. Jerry: See that guy he's talking with? That's her new boyfriend. George: Really? They work here in the office?

Jerry: Yeah. They're having a little fling so don't say anything. Jerry: You don't. He's a recovering alcoholic. He's been off the wagon for two years. George: "Off the wagon"?

Jerry: I think it's off the wagon. George: I think it's "on the wagon". Elaine: Jerry, George, what are you doing here?

Jerry: What am I doing here? Martin Scorsese - The Godfather. Francis Ford Coppola - Taxi Driver. Gus Van Sant - The Big Lebowski. Joel Coen - Shawshank Redemption.

Frank Darabont - Batman Begins. Christopher Nolan -